We all come into the world prepared to connect, and this is how we meet our most essential and fundamental needs. Human infants rely entirely on their primary caregivers to meet their basic needs: protection, defense, food, shelter, relaxation, and comfort. We must first recognize how much abuse and trauma influence any part of a child’s growth even before explaining the source of their difficult behaviors.
We are social-emotional beings with a natural need to communicate with others and create lasting attachment bonds. Skills for good communication and maintaining healthy relationships with a child are learnable, and certified parenting coaches are best placed to offer such services to the parents.
A child’s ability to develop effective coping skills is severely harmed by abuse, abandonment, and multiple disturbances of attachment relationships. However, it is essential to know that children become pro-socialized by their primary parent/child attachment arrangement. Humans have more prolonged adolescence to optimize opportunities for physical, physiological, mental, and moral growth at each point of development. Learning how to get along with others, provide empathy for others in pain, handle one’s suffering, take turns, live in a group with others, communicate, and express compassion are all meaningful experiences that form a child’s neurophysiological growth.Parents can support children exhibiting anti-social behavior by doing the following:
1. Being a leader
One crucial thing that the child desperately wants to recover is a meaningful, stable, and long-term primary bonding relationship. It is worth noting that children with antisocial tendencies fear and worry about bonding with their parents, siblings, and even their peers. The underlying difficulty for a parent raising a child who has experienced grief, abuse, or multiple placements is that their conventional parenting approach may be unsuccessful. The anxious states and maladaptive habits of their children leave most parents exhausted, overwhelmed, or provoked. Some parents become emotional and upset as a result of children’s misdemeanors. This way, they mirror the behaviors they are attempting to help their children to rectify. However, the parent must set the affective mood in which a trusted, dedicated, and lasting relationship can be formed, and ultimately, with time, the sense in which healing can occur. The parent’s emotional tone and intellect are the most critical aspects of this romantic dance between parent and child. It is the parent’s feeling that the infant perceives through their senses.
2. Knowing and understand yourself
Since most parents have never experienced this level of trauma, the experience of intimately engaging with their trauma-reactive infant can be excruciating and distressing for them. However, this discomfort will provide a vital moment for them to reflect on their own childhood experience and style. To be attached, one must have emotional intelligence and insights into one’s own mind, motives, values, and causes. This introspection has a learning effect on the parents, and they develop insights on how to bond with their children.
When in doubt, speak with experts who help families overcome social and emotional difficulties. Not only will they have the resources to make the journey easier, but they’ll help you to better understand what your child’s going through and create that understanding bond that will last a lifetime.
3. Pro-social behavior
Parents must make a cultural change away from conventional or coercive parenting methods to use attachment-facilitating approaches. They should utilize principles and activities that facilitate progressive growth and development. In such an environment, children will gradually begin assimilating such behaviors and modifying their personalities.
4. As a coping tactic, anti-social behavior is used.
When children are guarding themselves against attachment, they often hit, lie, cheat, and manipulate. These actions can be seen as defense tactics, a conditioned response to terror and fear. It’s important to remember that children aren’t aware of these stimuli or dynamics, and they’re relying on protective mechanisms to prevent more discomfort and anxiety. So, being a bit anti-social may trigger more admirable responses that can be reinforced.